Care with Nora

The Kitchen Table Check-In

Ten signs Mom or Dad may need more help at home. One sign on its own usually doesn't mean much; everyone has a messy week. Look for a pattern, or a change from how they used to be. Notice, jot it down, and compare over a few weeks.

Download the free printable PDF

1 · The House

  • The kitchen: spoiled food or an empty fridge, repeat purchases, scorched pans or the stove left on
  • Housekeeping has slipped: laundry piling up, trash overflowing, yard left to grow wild
  • Unopened mail: piles of envelopes, late notices, unusual repeat payments

2 · The Routine

  • Medications: organizer days still full, bottles running out too fast or too slow; ask the pharmacist to review
  • Missed dates: appointments, birthdays, trash day
  • Driving: new dents or scrapes, getting lost on familiar routes, nervous passengers

3 · The Person

  • Weight and appearance: clothes looking loose, same outfit days in a row, hygiene that used to matter
  • Moving around: holding on to furniture, avoiding stairs, unexplained bruises or a "little fall"
  • Mood and social life: pulling away from friends and hobbies, seeming down or anxious
  • Memory and confusion: repeating stories or questions, confused about the day, struggling with familiar tasks. Talk to their doctor; this is not a diagnosis.

What to do next

  1. Notice and write it down. Dates and specifics ("three expired cartons of milk on the 4th") beat "Dad seems off."
  2. Talk with them, not about them. Try: "Dad, what would make the week easier?"
  3. Connect with help. In the US, the free Eldercare Locator can connect you with your local Area Agency on Aging: call or text 1-800-677-1116 or visit eldercare.acl.gov.